I avoid Zellers like the plague, but inevitably I get drawn back there for something of great importance...like yesterday, - to buy Anne some much needed wool. (Anne with the broken foot - a story for another time)
I know going in, that whatever check-out line I pick will end up being the wrong one and I was not to be disappointed.
Finding the product of my search is not a problem for me. Hasn't been for years, since the first thing I do upon entering a department store - or similar type 'box' store, is seek out a sales clerk - sorry, an Associate, to act as my proxy in finding the object of my adventure out. Anne would spend a lifetime looking herself but again, that is another story...
Anyway, the real problem for me - and always has been - is finding a way to quickly pay for the items of my quest and speedily be on my way.
As per usual, I carefully surveyed the half dozen lines with 'open' lights on and decided that my best bet was the one most closest to me, as it contained the least number of shoppers. In reality, I knew that I was only kidding myself because I have tried this approach on countless other occasions to no avail.
I was fourth in line, feeling a bit silly with my one ball of wool. In actual fact, it was not a ball but a small oblong shaped pink bundle of yarn. Anyway, back to the line - the first two patrons sailed through without issue- they always do. Then the clerk served the 3rd customer, you know the one directly ahead of me.
The woman had but 4 items - all Halloween in nature. Three packages consisting of false eye lashes, false finger nails, and some wicked type of makeup. The fourth and final item was the traditional, conical, witch's black hat.
Now I am thinking to myself maybe I have been worrying for nought. How long can it take to ring through 4 rather small items albeit unusual ones. In fact, the transaction went without incident. The clerk quickly scanned the 4 horror items through and presented the lady with her very modest bill. The women reached into her purse and started to pull out a twenty dollar bill in payment and then .....she stopped.
She looked at her bill and queried the price. Hadn't she seen signs indicating 40% off rather than the lousy 25% she'd been given?
The clerk went to the handy sales bill on top of her counter and flipped quickly to the Halloween items and showed the lady that 25% was precisely what she was entitled to.
"But the signs said 40%", the woman wailed.
The clerk, to her credit, kept her calm - they always do and I have to think that that is half the problem. Maybe if they'd give these customers the gears from time to time it would help put this petty-type nonsense to rest. I digress.
The clerk then picked up her phone and called the suspect department blasting out for all and sundry to hear that a price check was needed.
We all waited. By this time my line had grown by an additional 4 or 5 others.
Five minutes lapsed and nothing. We all stood there looking at the phone.
Another call went out and another non-reply. More time having elapsed.
And me with my ball - or oblong of pink wool.
I was beginning to think 'horror' thoughts of my own.
Anyway - back to the line, which now was shrinking as those behind me skirted off to other lines. I laughed to myself thinking it served them right for lining up behind me in the first place. They should have known better.
Finally, a manager approached to hear the woman's sad tale of 25% rather than 40% reduction for these modestly priced novelties and the clerk explained the trouble she was having in getting through to the delinquent department.
The manager made a decision, as managers are apt to do. Not the one I was hoping for mind you - that being to give the lady the lousy 40%. No could do, since it would probably amount to the princely sum of a couple of dollars. Heck all they had to do was ask me and I'd have gladly paid it over for her.
No the manager decided that she personally would go and do the price check herself. How noble of her.
In the stores of my upbringing this would be no big deal but in these modern box stores it can amount to a great deal of lost time and energy.
Off she cheerfully went into the bowels of the building.
We all stood transfixed on the phone. And waited.
Finally a ring - and an answer and a response.
The signs advertising 40% related to products other than Halloween items. Case Closed.
The customer was so apologetic, I even began to feel sorry for her.
I even asked her if the costume was for her or a child.
She sheepishly admitted it was for her.
She'll make a great witch.
As I see it..
"Galagher"
p.s. From a book by Walter Mosley: "A life worth remembering is hell to live".