Monday, November 28, 2016

AIR CANADA'S SPECIAL YEAR 1988....

BUT IT IS OF SIGNIFICANCE ONLY TO AIR CANADA.

That was the year Air Canada ceased to be a government operation and became a private company.

Nothing of significance changed then and nothing of significance has changed since ... Air Canada (AC) is still the bureaucratic, sclerotic organization it has always been.

Canadian law protects AC from outside competition and it is just as well - at least for Air Canada...otherwise it would have been out of business years ago.

In a sense though it is not fair to centre AC out since I find that most airlines today abide by the same motto - make air travel as inconvenient and as unpleasant as possible for the flying public.

But given AC's bureaucratic start as a government agency - and its insistence to stubbornly adhere to its original princeps, it places them well in the race for worst airline ever.

Take our recent flight with AC...please.  (My thanks to Rodney Dangerfield)

Let's just bypass the terrorist-like shakedown otherwise known as surviving airport security and get right to the boarding process.

Since most airlines - including AC, charge for checked bags - the number, trying to camouflage bags in need checking as 'carry-on'... has grown exponentially.  Indeed, if you are not fortunate to be in the first third boarding you can fully expect that all overhead bins will be bulging at the seams well before you cross the plane's threshold.  

And you are left to jostle with the remaining two-thirds - most of whom are laden down with overgrown back-backs - in an attempt to reach your seat.  Not a pretty sight.

And speaking of seats - Airlines - including AC are now charging for them as well.  You would think the exorbitant ticket price would suffice...but oh no..pay-up or walk.

Almost ...pay-up for a seat or take your chances on where you sit.

As for me - I am 6 foot 2 inches and large framed - my greatest fear in flying is not crash landing ...rather it is being placed in the middle seat in a three seat row.  And guess what - that is exactly where I ended up in my recent flight. 

My wife Anne too was awarded the 'middle seat treatment'.

Whatever happened to placing a husband and wife next to each other? 

And speaking of children ...all of ours are fully grown but a younger couple came to our attention recently who had their family farmed out into a series single seats.  One of their toddlers ended up beside a strange man.  I will not mention the name of the airline since I got this information second hand. 

And continuing on with our discussion about seats - they really cannot be placed any closer to one another.  There is no way my legs can fit behind the seat in front and the seats we sit in are so close to the ones beside us we end up sharing an armrest with our neighbour. Hopefully they do not have BO.

I fully expect the next step the airlines will take is to incorporate standing room and in many respects I think that might very well be an improvement over their current offerings.

But I am not finished...not by a long shot.

It used to be that an un-eatable snack was included in the overblown price of your ticket.  Not any more.

Now if you want an un-eatable snack, you have to pay through the nose for it.

Everything has a cost and there is now a cost for everything.

As an aside I bet many airlines are still charging a fuel surtax that came about when oil prices climbed several years ago. They have bottomed out since but I would not be surprised if the surtax is still alive and well.

But I digress.

I am now talking about the food and drink carts that clog the aisles and rob the flying public of their hard-earned shekles. 

They also block passage....to the toilets.

We had over 200 souls on our recent flight and but 2 toilets at the back of the plane - i.e. for steerage. 

And Guess What.

Most of steerage could not reach those self same two toilets for over an hour.

My wife and I sat near those toilets so it was not an issue for us per se - but for most of the other steeragers - it was a big issue.  Some were literally dancing a jig...I have never seen such pained facial expressions.

One lady near the front...just behind first class, made a beeline for the first class head and was stopped cold.  She told the stewardess what she thought of her in so many words..and when we finally landed she was taken off in cuffs by the local constabulary.

I can just hear the poor woman telling her story before an impartial Judge ... Problem will be the Judge probably never travels steerage.

And one more thing - the food and drink cart never did make it to our back row seats even though the flight was some 3 hours in duration. 

Probably just as well.

As I see it...

'K.D. Galagher'