IT DEPENDS ...

ON WHAT, YOU MIGHT WELL ASK.

Well, the 'depending case at hand' concerns our Miele Vacuum Cleaner.  It stopped working.  Or at least, I stopped it working.

The other day I was engaged in my annual vacuuming of our family car and in so doing, was using our household Miele Vacuum Cleaner.

I know - should have used a Shop Vac...

We had paid king's ransom for it some years ago and it had functioned well ever since ...until my annual car cleaning event of last week.

I was 2/3 rds done when it suddenly shut down.  I hit the re-set button and zilch.  

So now what?

Given its pedigree, I took it back to the dealer where we had purchased it some 7 years ago.  (They sell and service nothing but vacuums and the German Miele is one of their best sellers. Kinda like the Mercedes of vacuums you could say).

Nice olde man at the counter greeted me with that knowing smile - you know - that ..'you broke our machine' kinda look.

I asked him for his advice - 'would it be better to have the critter fixed or should we be looking at buying a new vacuum?'

"Depends" he said.

'Depends on what I countered'?

"On how serious the problem".

So I left it with him with his promise to call me within a few days to let me know the extend of the repair.  I of course was expecting the worse -i.e. she's kaput ... so what have you got on sale...

Instead, when he called, it was with good news - "a plastic water bottle top had caught in the upper portion of the hose".

So it was a minor problem after all and I arranged to come in and pick it up and pay his bill.

When I got there the following ensued:

He told me that the bottle cap had become lodged in the upper part of the hose and that the vacuum's "panel" had automatically shut the machine down before more serious damage had occurred.

I said, 'well that was a good thing'.

"Depends" he replied.

'On what I countered'

"On whether or not the system will shut down again in the future.  This could have been a one-time only occurrence".

'Never thought of that' said I.

'So is there anything we can do to try to prevent this from re-happening' says I.

"Depends" he says.

'On what', says I 

"On whether or not you like the Miele." 

'What do you mean by "like"... until this recent occurrence, it has always worked well.'

"Well it is like buying a car - some people like a ford, others a chev - some like blue ...others red."

Now this was getting bizarre ... what had a working Miele Vacuum Cleaner - albeit used, have to do with buying a car of any colour?

He went on - "you might like your Miele, but I might like another make".  He stood back looking quite satisfied.

I thought to myself .. isn't this guy in the business of selling Mieles?- one of their best lines and now it appeared to me he was suggesting that a better more reliable option exists.

I told him I would take a chance - it had worked okay for 7 years - and as the problem was just a stuck bottle cap, we could hope that it would be good for another 7.

Our Miele though was a dull black...

Anyway, I paid his bill and was about to leave when I foolishly mentioned another problem we were having with the machine.

'From time to time the power to the vacuum hose inexplicably shuts off, any idea what would cause that?'

"Well it depends ...but what do you do when it happens?"

'I push the hose's on button and it restarts'.

"Seems reasonable, why don't you just keep doing that".

For the first time I found myself in total agreement with the olde fellow.

'Sounds reasonable' I said.

"But it depends" he said.

'Depends on what', I shot back.

"On whether you want to purchase a new hose"

'How much' I asked.

"Over $200"

'I think I will take you initial advice and simply turn the hose back on when it cuts out'.

Once again he came back with one of his Depends - "Depends whether or not you want to get another 7 years out of your Miele."

I pretended not to hear this as I hurried out of his shoppe with my repaired merchandise in hand.

On the way home though I vowed to get a Shop-Vac for next year's cleaning of our car.

And, I think I will get a Red One.

As I see it...

'K.D. Galagher'